The Feedback You Never Get
Your exec thinks you're brilliant...they just haven't told you.
Something I have noticed in almost every coaching conversation I have with executive assistants, administrative assistants, and personal assistants is that the ones most trusted by their exec, the ones carrying the most weight for the Org, fielding the hardest problems, are often the least likely to hear it directly.
Not because it isn’t true. Because it is not always said out loud.
I heard it again recently. A senior leader talking about their executive assistant at an event: “They are genuinely one of the most capable people I have ever worked with.” Said it with total conviction. I asked whether they had said it to them. Long pause. “I think they know.”
Ermm…They probably don’t.
This is not about ungrateful executives. Most of the leaders I work with value their assistants far more than they express. But praise that stays lateral, said to peers, mentioned in passing, never landing with the person it’s about, does nothing for executive assistant career development. It doesn’t show up at performance review time. It doesn’t open a door. It doesn’t help you make a case for what comes next.
How to get recognised at work as an executive assistant is one of the questions I am asked most often by people at every level of the profession. And the honest answer is that recognition rarely travels on its own. The work that goes unnoticed tends to stay that way, not because it doesn’t matter, but because nobody built a bridge for it.
I spent years assuming the people above me knew what I was doing and why it mattered. That if I kept doing good work, eventually someone would notice. I am pretty sure you know that feeling too.
What I learned is that the gap isn’t about effort. It’s about visibility. And visibility in the administrative profession almost never happens by accident, which is something I talk about a lot in my executive assistant coaching and mentoring work, and on conference & event stages.
For administrative professionals who are serious about career growth, this is the work that actually moves things. Not doing more. Making sure what you already do can be seen, understood, and, crucially, talked about by the right people.
The framework I use for this is SEE. Spot, Express, Embed. Not about shouting about your work. About making sure the right people can actually see it, in the right moments, without it feeling forced. It sits at the heart of what I teach executive assistants and personal assistants who want to move from being trusted to being visibly valued.
📌 Paid subscribers get three deep dives in this edition:
1. Where the praise is actually going, how to spot when recognition is happening around you rather than to you, and why that distinction matters more than most people realise for executive assistant career growth and professional development.
2. How to draw it out without asking the conversation directly approaches that work, including the exact language I use and recommend. No awkward “can you tell me how I’m doing?” moments. Specific, repeatable, and something you can use this week.
3. How to close the loop yourself what to do when your exec genuinely doesn’t know they’re not feeding anything back, and how to build a habit so you’re never relying on lateral praise to make your case at the moments that count.
No leaders section in this edition. This one is just for you.
If you’re a free subscriber and this is floating your L&D boat, this is what paid looks like every week. The full thing, not just the frame. 7-day free trial available. No commitment.
